Finally Facebook

Unlike Zadie Smith, I was not there. (Though how was she, nine years Mark Zuckerberg’s senior? Grad School?) Regardless, not only was I not at Harvard, I was not in college during the inception of Facebook. I barely even had a cell phone in college. Not until my Senior year at least. I didn’t text anyone, I didn’t poke anyone. When we said we were going to meet at the bar at 11, we met at 11. I also used the card catalog. I’m making myself feel old.

The point is that it was my friends a few years younger than me who forced me join Facebook, years after it had become popular. “You have to,” they always said, “you just do.” Why? There never seemed to be a clear answer to that question. But I admit I was tempted. Every time they snapped a picture and yelled “Default!” I kind of wanted in on the game.

But something about joining Facebook seemed grotesquely self-indulgent. Who did I think I was that anyone would care to be my online friend, let alone see my vacation pics or know when I was eating lunch? I admit I had the urge to stalk people, but making my own profile seemed ridiculous.

Until it didn’t. Until I realized that everyone was having the time of their lives commenting on photos and sharing links, and I was completely missing out. I joined, and those first few weeks of Facebook were such a rush.

So then I was batting for the other team. I begged my older sister and few older friends to join because they “just had to.” Finally they did, and they totally got it too. This was just a new form of communication. Like having a cell phone had been 10 years ago.

And didn’t cell phones seem totally self-indulgent too? Again, who did I think I was? Some CEO that needed to be available at the drop of a hat? Of course not. Will the earth crumble if my BFF can’t get ahold of me at a moment’s notice? No. The bottom line was I just didn’t feel important enough to have a cell phone. That was, of course, until I realized all sorts of unimportant people had cell phones, and by abstaining I was just making my life less convenient.

Which is why it’s not all that surprising that, despite its youthful roots, the middle-aged and far beyond are now on Facebook. The bottom line is, if they want to see pictures of their grandkids, they have no other choice. Having a Facebook profile is now almost as necessary as having a cell phone or an email address. It’s simply another form of communication, and deep down, no one wants to be left out.